17 October 2006

Argh! Argh! Argh! Argh!

*jumping up and down in frustration*
I don’t know what’s wrong with me… I’ve got a weird version of writers block! Just cant seem to get the words out. Or rather… I’m STUCK!
Ok… sigh… let me explain. I have an article to write for work. Silly thing about Robbie Williams… but, for some unknown reason, I just cant get a handle on it! WHY!??
Gah… so my brief is basically, 700 words on Robbie. Make it current, make it snappy, use a lot of quotes, give the article a “Robbie” flavour. It should sound a bit like him. But… what is that exactly? I DON’T KNOW! I mean, sure, I do like some of Robbie’s stuff… and I guess I got to include info on Rudebox, since that’s the most current thing. But it cant be biographical! And I guess I’ve just gotten so used to writing these research papers for college, I don’t know what I’m doing here. Also, I think I’m suffering from a healthy, or un-healthy actually, since its stopping me form being able to write my article, which is producing a LOT of stress, amount of fear. Why? Well… I’m really scared I’m going to write crap, and they’re going to hate it. Which sucks. Coz now I cant write ANYTHING! Better to have bad work that can be fixed, then no work at all!
Which is why the frustration and jumping up and down.
Siiiiiigh… ok… now I’m going to take another shot at it. So ta-rah…

6 October 2006

Sorry for the cliché

TGIF!
The day I’ve had can best be described in one word. Gak! Hehe…. Actually, it wasn’t that bad. Had quite a lot of work to do… But it’s only 4:30 and I’m all done. I would leave, but its storming. So I’m stuck here till it stops.
Hopefully that’s soon. I have a piano class to take at 6:30, and I don’t feel like cancelling, the kid missed last week too. But boy, I am not in the mood to teach a five year old. Usually I love it. They’re all so intelligent and they like learning, so it’s no hardship… but it also take a LOT of patience. Five year olds do not have a large attention span. There’s an understatement! It’s challenging to keep them interested, but it’s also really amusing.
On a totally different topic… I’m listening to my music library on shuffle. The strangest playlist is popping up. I just went from Hot Steppa to Boulevard of Broken dreams, and weirdly enough, it wasn’t that much of a leap. In fact, it was a pretty good segue.
Ok… now I’m going to go check on the rain. And if it’s stopped, then I shall leave.

14 September 2006

Darn It!!

How come I can create new post and everything, but I can’t actually see my blog!?
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh!!! *jump up and down in frustration.*
It’s been a week, and it still claims “this page is not available"
When the heck is it going to be? Huh? When!?

28 August 2006

Ok... so maybe I'm not a murderer

And also, I like the way this blog looks better then my other one.

Just posted a couple of poems up on that one. I created them a month or so ago, but only just got around to putting them online. May as well put ‘em up here too. Apologies to those who read the other one as well So here goes:

Sit Awhile
Sit awhile and think.
Sit and dream of all things,
That were, and are and will be.

Sit awhile and see.
See the thought flow,
Like the play of light upon a prism.
Many streams,
From one clear contemplation.

Sit awhile.
Life is only worth
Your well thought adaptation.


Destiny
I sleep,
In this unguarded moment,
The door is open
And you tiptoe in.

So maybe they’re just dreams.
Only wishful thinking
And not the destiny they seem.

But who’s to say?
Is there some science that could divine the truth?
Or will only time tell?

11 August 2006

ketch-up anyone?

Yes I know… terrible joke. Actually, I’m thinking of killing this blog… for a variety of reasons. But mainly coz I’m getting tired of apologizing every time I write for the fact that I haven’t written in months. So… maybe just one final post. And then officially axe it…

What to talk about? Well… lots has happened. Finals went ok. I assume. Haven’t gotten my grades yet. For my final project as well. So for all I know, I’m still in college…. What a happy thought.
I should probably call one of the faculty and find out what the heck is going on huh? Yes… I think that would be a good idea.
Meanwhile, I’ve started working. At… you guessed it, WorldSpace. Been here almost two months. Still not sure why they hired me… maybe I shouldn’t be writing that :) at office at the moment. Hehe… totally bored. Been working my ass off the whole of this week, coz a long weekend is coming up, and we wanted to finish all the work for the September issue of The Voice (WorldSpaces newsletter) before that. Actually, Monday isn’t technically a holiday, and Wednesday is only an optional holiday, but obviously everyone is taking Wed off, and Mon too, if they don’t have work. Which is the main reason for the crazy rush.
Anyway! As I was saying, I’m seriously, seriously bored. It’s always much worse to have nothing to do, after days of too much to do! I certainly find it much harder to cope. And when that happens… well… lets just say that I get a little paranoid. I start wondering, ‘am I doing ok?’, ‘do they like me?’, ‘will they want to keep me on after three months??’, and basically, fall into a quagmire of dark thoughts and self-doubt. NOT pretty :)… I assure you.
The people I work with are nice though. But I really, really don’t get why they think I know anything about editing, or writing for a magazine, or any of that valuable stuff necessary when your part of a content teem. I did tell them that although I did study media, my field of interest has always been film. And that I really haven’t had anything much to do with print media… maybe they weren’t listening.
See! That’s what I was talking about. Crazy thoughts! Although, sadly, true. I wonder what I’m doing with my life. I mean, I’ve always been interested in animation and Children’s Programming, what am I doing in a field so removed from all that? In a job I am totally unqualified for!? Seriously… what the heck is this? And why do I feel like the only one who doesn’t know where they’re going?
Frankly, I think I just need to chill. It’s the unflagging conviction of years of knowing exactly what I wanted to do with my life coming back to bite me. Saying ‘See!? This is what you get for being the type of person who decided what she wanted to do when she was 4 and stuck to it! THIS is what happens when you don’t go through that feeling of “What Next!!” after school! Serves you right you weirdo.’
Ok… now that I’ve really depressed myself, I think I better quit this topic. And the blog too… I never have believed in leaving on a high note. :)